In a whirlwind of assignments, interviews and other things, I ended up in a few different places. A lot of them familiar and a lot of them frustrating. As always, there's another job on the horizon, and as per usual, exams will be/are looming. I have the dates and everything clashes and I'm handling it the only way I can. Except that I've gained two kgs and I don't know how to get rid of them in a permanent way. Maybe one kg drops off but that's just for the one day and I don't know what to do about it besides just cutting portions or changing what I eat and exercising but it's not actually working.
I was really enjoying the first four months of being lighter.
I've read everything I can and all it is that once you reach a certain weight, you either have to drive yourself on to work harder to lose more or you have to keep struggling to maintain it, which I've known since I was like, twelve. But it doesn't make any of this easier, or any nicer. Never mind that I get hungry at the weirdest times for the strangest things, and my skin is breaking out, my assignment piles just keep growing which means I have no time to exercise the way I should be.
My training and my exams are going to clash, which is the most uncomfortable feeling in the world, really.
In an attempt to be a nice person, I've been rereading and editing resumes and cover letters for my friends and juniors. No, as in, this is a plural and it is not a lie, it's actually something I'm doing as either a good deed or hobby. Pick one, it's equally as odd to me as it sounds.
There's no changing people, or what they say or do. Their actions are their own. You can't control them and you can't change them. You can only handle how you feel about it. Which, unfortunately, is the usual anvil drop of anguish and desperate frustration and despair. But then we just get up and keep fighting on, just as we always do.